Scene: the bathroom. I am, for a terribly brief moment, alone. The door opens and the child walks in.
“Mama, I need you to open this for me”
“Okay, here you go.”
“Hey Mama, whatcha doing?”
“I’m going potty”
“Am I privacying you?”
“No, privacy is when you let Mama go the bathroom alone.”
“No, I can privacy you and still be with you in the bathroom.”
“No, because privacy means someone is alone in the bathroom.”
“Well, I don’t want you to be alone. So I’ll privacy you but I’ll stay in the bathroom too.”
(and here is where I sigh and realize I won’t be alone in the bathroom anytime in the next five years).
“Is poop a bathroom word?”
“Yes, you know that it is”
(and END SCENE)