If the same person has texted you the message “shit just got real” about an ongoing situation multiple times, at what point can you text back “shit is real. It is staying real. We must adapt to the ongoing realness of this fecal matter”?
Could anything good be happening when a boy yells “Hey Mom, come to the bathroom! I want to show you a new way to pee!”
(Spoiler alert: no)
Are children born in Minnesota equipped with some special internal fur coat or something? This question arose from reading the weather cancellation policy for the public schools and noting that they won’t close for cold unless it is -40 with the wind chill. Negative freaking 40.
Is this child who is laying on my face, breathing directly into my nose, and who just coughed on my eyeball coming down with a cold?
(spoiler alert: yes. Fight, immune system, fight)
What goes on in her little brain?
(wondered after E. said, out of nowhere, while we were eating dinner, “I’m going to say hi to the chicken now and then my shark is going to dance”)
(we were having hot dogs. And we don’t have chickens)
Is it Christmas music time now? How about now? Maybe now?
(no, I will stay strong. Not until after Thanksgiving)